1. |
Been Without
02:40
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ran a thousand days it feels
so good to see you home
I’ve been in a panic in a craze
and I’m not dreaming none
we’re always building something
in an old thing’s rotted frame
you do the best alone and you
understand I do the same but
I’ve been without you for so long
I've been without you
They are paper tigers out there
Look at what they’ve got
self-serving augury from cruel
and atavistic thought
I always run right into any
roadblocks in my way
I want to get things perfect
but I can’t wait another day ‘cause
I’ve been without you for so long
I’ve been without you
the walls are caving
the world is wearing down
immiserating
this endless runaround
the wound’s not healing
there’s [sic] people leaving all the time
but I don’t want this over
when it goes we’re gone
ran a thousand days it feels
so good to see you home
I’ve been in a panic in a craze
and I’m not dreaming none
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2. |
I Surrender
02:44
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I can't do it anymore
I hear every word you've said and I can't make them make sense
I can't do it anymore
Please be kind, please let me down easy and swiftly
Cause I'm trying, I'm trying and I fail
I'm shaking, I'm shaking at the thought
Blow me down I've turned to dust
Ash and smoke in the morning light
I'm made of open wounds
Inviting a stray finger to explore their inner walls
I'm made of open wounds
That can't be sutured, infected with disease
Cause I'm trying, I'm trying and I fail
I'm shaking, I'm shaking at the thought
Blow me down I've turned to dust
Ash and smoke in the morning light
I surrender
I surrender
I surrender
I surrender
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3. |
Phone
03:32
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Open up my eyelids
Until my sight’s adjusted
Analyze the ceiling
Can’t escape the feeling that
I could sleep. I could dream.
Without this void beside me
I could sleep. I could dream.
I keep looking at my phone in the middle of the night
As if I could atone through a satellite
and staring at my messages could set ‘em alight
I’m looking at my phone in the middle of the
I’m looking at my phone in the middle of the night
Not any less alone in its pale moonlight
If anyone can hear me – I will put it all right
I’m looking at my phone in the middle of the night
See your read receipt and
“Sorry” bears repeating
Not enough to tell you
Only showing will do now
I could sleep. I could dream
Without this void beside me
I could sleep. I could dream.
I keep looking at my phone in the middle of the night
As if I could atone through a satellite
and staring at my messages could set ‘em alight
I’m looking at my phone in the middle of the
I’m looking at my phone in the middle of the night
Not any less alone in its pale moonlight
If any one can hear me – I will put it all right
I’m looking at my phone in the middle of the night
When every text is a crisis
Should we be left to our own devices?
We ruined all the surprises
Should we be left to our own devices?
I’m not alone
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4. |
The Moon
03:24
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we’ll go out you and I sometime
had enough of the reclusive life
catch you up, rank and itemize
different bands different types of guys
it’s only having fun
we roll with insufficient funds
you know you had it when they named you
it’s hard to get things right
I know I’m headed for the same moon
you always kept in sight
it’s a tether and a light
Joan of Arc; Imhotep and Ra;
Myrna Loy; undetected stars;
when you’re gone
you are never gone
still you’re out
leaving something wrong
I don’t trust memory to stay
I wish you here today
you know you had it when they named you
it’s hard to get things right
I know I’m headed for the same moon
we’ll throw it down and drive to the light
you know you had it when they named you
it’s hard to get things right
I know I’m headed for the same moon
we’ll throw it down and drive to the light
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5. |
Stay
02:56
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To quantify the space between
To measure the distance from
Where we stand and where we're going
What a horrid thing, what an awful thing
To step into the future
As if it's welcoming us
Beckoning us for embrace
What a fallacy, what a complete fucking fallacy
Making peace with uncertainty
Making peace with machinery
Grind the gears against my bones
They make such a great pair, such a great pair
Chaos is a form of stasis
Don't have to think, just have to breathe
Entropy and ecstasy
No plans, just vibes, until you die
Stay inside
It's safe inside
Don't stay inside
It's not safe inside
Stay inside
It's safe inside
Don't stay inside
You're dead inside
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6. |
Take Me Apart
03:28
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Row house - two up and one down
My roommates like to party
I could sulk all night, awake with eyes shut tight
Or join in if only partly
You’re there. One look – It isn’t fair.
I’m broken at the binding
With a reader’s eye and editor’s red line
No telling what you’re finding
When you take me apart
Leave a marker for my heart
Take me apart. I wanna start again
When you take me apart
Leave a marker for my heart
Take me apart again
Now the party’s raging and I’m deflating, slouched like a dog eared book
Like an old James Patterson page-per-chapter, don’t know how long they took
But you’re still reading and I’m receding
We could wake as friends and start again
Row house - two up and one down
My roommates like to party
With my eyes shut tight I toss and turn left right
I’m working in the morning
You’re there – felt a change in the air
You’re looking for a shelter
Could we talk all night
A race against first light
Til I’m grasping for my centre
When you take me apart
Leave a marker for my heart
Take me apart. I wanna start again
If you take me apart
Leave a marker for my heart
Take me apart again
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7. |
Theme from "Belonging"
01:25
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8. |
Pastures
02:11
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Place your roots into the ground
And a tree will grow up through the dirt
Reaching towards eternity
But even this will surely fall
I know
I know
Stay planted here
Even if it's rotten
Stay planted here
Hopelessly forgotten
Plans for a better life
Contend with mass decay
We pissed on all the plants
We took a shit on this fecund soil
I know
I know
Stay planted here
Even if it's rotten
Stay planted here
Hopelessly forgotten
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9. |
Falling Through
02:01
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I couldn’t hear you
I couldn’t pull away from the sound
it was insistent
it was dragging me all around
my attention has come unglued
chain reaction – falling through
and the ground just sinks
and you thought it was solid but it wasn’t
tied to the basement
had to devote myself to the good
screen and the bad screen
I couldn’t sleep but I never could
my attention has come unglued
chain reaction – falling through
and the night just sinks
and you thought it was something
but it wasn’t
been so long since I liked the sun
I’m a stranger to almost anyone
I’m in the airwaves
I’m on the hunt for nothing to do
how do you make things?
how do you work when it’s never for you?
my attention has come unglued
chain reaction – falling through
and the ground just sinks
and you thought it was solid but it’s not
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10. |
Optimism
02:09
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In the future we will look back and think
We had it so good, we should just shut our mouths.
In all honesty, that is just dumb as hell, maybe we could make things happen right now
I'm tired of optimism
There's no reason to get your hopes up
I've been slouching towards bedlam
my whole life
Is the future nothing more than a fairy tale, a bedtime story to mollify us
If that is true then we can't keep thinking ahead, placing our faith in the natural order
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11. |
State of Shock
01:47
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early out again your mind is
racing like you have no mind
go to speak the words recycle
usually they're from online
catch your breath outside
if you're inclined if you're inclined
everything that's happened to you
living in a state of shock
all the current passing through you
living in a state of shock
trick yourself to spend your effort
managing your own decline
waking up without a sense
of edges or dividing lines
I'm giving up on time
I'll survive I'm done with time
everything that's happened to you
living in a state of shock
all the current passing through you
living in a state of shock
try to save a house imploding
living in a state of shock
I don't blame the sky for closing
living in a state of shock
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12. |
Hold Fast
03:27
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Hold fast
Not just a town on the prairie
Hold fast – keep holding on
You might ask for a rule but it varies
Hold fast – keep holding on
Hold fast to the light
Bleeding at the edges of the black outs
It’s morning - It’s morning if we allow it
Hold fast to the night
Filling the recesses of the dugouts
It’s morning – it’s morning if we allow it
Can it hold forever?
Hold fast
Hold to the faith that you buried
Hold fast – keep holding on
We’re all drenched in the water we carried
Hold fast – keep holding on
Can it hold forever?
Hold fast to the light
Bleeding at the edges of the black outs
It’s morning - It’s morning if we allow it
Hold fast to the night
Filling the recesses of the dugouts
It’s morning – it’s morning
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Belonging Edmonton, Alberta
There should be a band that plays guitar pop.
Members of Spruce Island (Regina/Edmo), These Estates (Regina/Edmo), and Alloys (Edmo).
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